Cry me a Mystic River

Finally saw Eastwood's latest flick last night. Right now, I'm still struggling to understand why that movie would be a candidate for Best Picture.

It's pretty easy to pinpoint where things go wrong--the "fade to white" about 20 minutes before the end. After that, the movie goes downhill, fast. It's not pretty: Laura Linney's character, which has been essentially undeveloped to that point, turns into a Lady Macbeth, and starts spouting random nonsense. Marcia Gay Harden's character is last seen trying to get her son to smile for her. And Sean Penn and Kevin Bacon's last conversation really doesn't work. [And people complained about Return of the King having too many endings. Sheesh.]

One more note--the "score" for this movie is pretty lousy. It's written in best Sondheim fashion: theme and repetition. Good heavens--repeating "1-4-low 7-1" (or whatever that infernal pattern was) over and over again, throughout the movie, doesn't give it atmosphere. It shows lack of creativity.

And, please, don't let Tim Robbins affect a Boston accent ever again. [And, on a more frightening note--would anybody believe that of the three principals in that movie, Kevin Bacon is the oldest?]

What the heck?

The Boston Globe and the Weather Channel are both warning about a storm that will dump 6 to 12 inches of snow in the region. The radar clearly shows a storm right on top of us. Yet, looking out my window, you'd think the snow was the meteorological equivalent of Iraq's weapons of mass destruction--in other words, nowhere to be found. Utterly confusèd am I.

Random thoughts and randomer searches

The latest installment on thoughts.

• In the latest Priceline web ads, William Shatner looks a lot like the German baritone Thomas Quasthoff, with whiter hair. It's really creepy.
  
• What's the rule which governs when final l's in verbs get doubled in the participle? [That is, travelling versus snorkeling.]
  
• While watching Spielberg's Taken, one of the more unfortunate facts of life is that two of the characters--two of the less savory ones--attended Yale. What freaked me out was not that they were Yaloe attendees, but that the producers of the series had done enough research to know about the freshman "Perspectives on Science" course.
  

And searches:

• Dukakis in a dunk tank
  
• Gollum full 3d glasses
  
• Tom Brady "Patriots" democrat republican
  
• Andy Serkis' Arabic
  
• Songs for baritenor
  
• borderline personality 2004 globe and mail
  
• non-accredited web for a meteorologist
  
• Andy Roddick commerical [sic!]
  

People on the web are scary.

Too much media hype?

You know playoff mania has gotte out of hand when the portal for The Boston Globe gives the Patriots first billing the day after the Iowa caucuses, even when a senator from Massachusetts, who everybody had written off by now, seizes a rather impressive victory.

Putting Peyton in his place

An ugly 24-14 win that really wasn't anywhere near as close as the final score suggested (except for some ugliness late in the game). In honor of the Patriots' shellacking of Manning yesterday, I offer

Top 10 Signs You're Playing the Patriots and You're Not Headed to Super Bowl XXXVIII

10. Your team's white and blue jerseys start resembling BDU's.

9. Rather than asking you "Who da Man(ning)?," the opposing defense asks you "Who's your Daddy?"

8. Your passer rating looks like an NFL score rather than the Mavericks' average tally.

7. The referee who unearthed the "Tuck Rule" is judging whether the opposing QB committed a fumble.

6. The opposing defense is knocking your guys so hard they look like they're doing the Fosbury Flop in the high jump.

5. You stare up at the sky, wondering when the snow will stop--or at least when you'll stop seeing stars--at least four times during the game.

4. Your teammate's name is the answer to the question: "When do you have trouble snapping?"

3. You can't even punt without handing points to your opponent.

2. The opposing linebacker has as many catches as--for more yards than--your favorite receiver.

1. You're seen mouthing "Goddamit!" as you skulk off the field, eyes rolling all the while, more than once.

Wrapping up the nomination, eh?

With the results from Iowa caucuses now more or less finalized:

• Dean is disappointed;
  
• Edwards is thrilled;
  
• Kerry is resuscitated;
  
• Gephardt is through.
  

Most of the polls in the days leading up to the caucus showed the race tightening; I don't think anybody saw this result play out. . . . 38 percent Kerry, 32 percent Edwards, and 18 percent Dean.

The race just got interesting.

Bush as champion of human rights?

There's been a bit of debate lately amongst people I know regarding Bush's alleged statement that he had done more for civil rights than any other president. Most people I know would argue that this is utter nonsense. At least one individual, however, is defending this statement on the grounds that Bush's "war on terror" has had an ancillary effect on wars around the globe.

I'm not sure that I'd count stopping civil wars as a "human rights" issue. Human rights include issues such as:

Article 9. No one shall be subjected to arbitrary arrest, detention or exile.

Article 10. Everyone is entitled in full equality to a fair and public hearing by an independent and impartial tribunal, in the determination of his rights and obligations and of any criminal charge against him.

which clearly is at great odds with what our government is doing and trying to do. Or, similarly,

Article 19.

Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers,"

which, as Tim's recent experience suggests, is a right that we don't freely enjoy even within our own borders. At this point, it's hard to make the case of Bush advancing human rights.

"Quality of life" is one thing, "human rights" another entirely separate from the former.

Diction woes, part deux

Just saw a TV commercial for "Freschetta" brand frozen pizza. I was surprised to see that it's pronounced "FRESH-et-ta," which means that the people responsible for this product have no understanding of Italian diction whatsoever. . . .

Was he at the same concert?

I'm sorry, but sometimes critics can be on crack--they either don't know what they're talking about, or they're operating on auto-pilot or fond memories.

Case in point. Richard Dyer--normally a fairly reliable critic--gave the BSO's performance of Berlioz's L'Enfance a glowing review, and offers such commendations as

There was a strong team of soloists, led by tenor Keith Lewis, who sang the Narrator with sympathetic timbre and meaningful diction.

This is utter nonsense: for the first two minutes, Mr. Lewis sang pitches, but I could not understand what he was saying--much less even decipher what language he was singing. Furthermore, when professional soloists are careless enough with their diction that they change the gender of individuals (by changing vowel sounds so as to indicate the addition of a mute e at the end of a word, for example), they should not get a radiant review.

And as confirmation that I wasn't totally alone in my thoughts, the people sitting behind me included a vocal coach and her friend, who were commenting to one another all the atrocities being committed by the soloists. I couldn't help but nod agreement with their discussion, and wince in horror at what my ears were being tortured with.

A revealing night at the BSO, to say the least.

Ten random thoughts: Football mania edition

So, now that we know that next week's Championship weekend will be Indianapolis at New England and Carolina at Philadelphia, a few thoughts on the Patriots' battle with Tennessee yesterday.

• I unfortunately had to miss most of the first half, as I was out with friends for dinner, and we didn't leave the restaurant until kickoff. On the other hand, I had a chance to watch Return of the King, but I figured it'd be worth it to watch the game instead. This time, fortunately, I was correct in my judgment.
  
• The Boston Globe had it almost right when they claimed that the Patriots had "home-refrigerator advantage" in yesterday's game. It should, of course, have read "home-freezer advantage" given the extremely cold conditions; I suspect yesterday's game was one of the six or so coldest games ever (given that only three were played at 0 or below, and yesterday's temperatures plunged to 2 or below).
  
• Brady's impersonations of a running back and an offensive lineman were amusing to say the least; it's no surprise that they made the highlight reels.
  
• Speaking of highlight reels, has there been any game that has had such a string of highlight-reel worthy plays in a single five-minute span? Consider:
  
  • the fourth-and-3 pass from Brady to Brown to keep the final drive going;
    
  • the 46-yard field goal that was eerily reminiscent of the miracle kick from the "Snow Bowl" two years ago;
    
  • the not one, but two, back-to-back passes from McNair to Bennett which were "that close" to being out-of-bounds (and both of which had to be reviewed);
    
  • the final desperation stand at fourth-and-12, after third-and-23, that led to seemingly the entire Pats defense knocking Bennett out of the way, to stop what would have been an otherwise certain first down and Titans win.
  As I said, that's a lot for the final five minutes of the game, the last ninety-eight seconds of which were spent by the Patriots bleeding the clock dry after regaining possession.
  
• I think it was right around the fourth-and-3 pass that I knew this game was going to drive me nuts; it wasn't until the third-and-23 stand that I realized that the Patriots were going to find a way to win the game.
  
• I also think that the winners in this game were the Patriots and Mother Nature; she may have even one this one outright.
  
• Mad props to the Patriots for all of their work to make sure that fans could enjoy the game relatively safely. Allowing people to bring in blankets and sleeping bags, as well as distributing free (decaf!) coffee and hand warmers were nice and welcome touches. [Or at least I'd appreciate most of those if I had actually been attending the game.]
  
• So, naturally, I'm amazed that those players--particularly the Titans--were actually able to survive spending that much time outside without more cold-related injuries (frostbite, numbness, etc.)
  
• Frightening quote of the day: Vinatieri was quoted in the New York Times as saying: "The balls weren't real soft, but the nice thing about it was I couldn't feel my feet." This makes us all feel so much better--but at least we didn't know that before the kick.
  
• Finally, also from the post-game show: why Tom Brady likes to wear hats that went out with World War II--except for select golfers--is beyond my ken.
  

Straight-to-dumpster flicks?

Now there was an article in The Onion a while back about how a new movie was being released "straight to dumpster." This came back to me the other day, because there was a "street vendor" at the Park Street T station yesterday selling DVD's. What caught me was that somebody was selling a DVD for Love Don't Cost a Thing.

So, I figure it has to be a knock-off video. Right? Well, it's not. According to the IMDB record for this cinematic masterpiece, the DVD has already been released, less than a month after the movie was released. If there's a bigger sign that your movie has bombed, I'd love to know what that might be.

Who?

I just received a message from "¸ÞÀÏ." I have absolutely no idea how the heck I should translate this--but I don't think it's a message from the Artist formerly known as Prince. . . .

One department, many research projects

If there was any doubt as to how diverse a field chemical engineering has become, consider the following observation.

This morning, I gave my final update to my thesis committee--the next time I see them as a committee should be my thesis defense. A couple of hours after my defense, I walked by a room where another student was giving her update. My update included a discussion of computational efficiency; her update included a discussion of killing efficiency. As in animals. Or, rather, as in ex-animals. It's pretty clear that I was left scratching my head trying to understand this.

But, hey, at least it's not me executing the small furry critters.

Spam count

I was curious to find out exactly how much spam I get in a year. So, thanks to Eudora and MIT's IMAP mail servers, I actually managed to keep track of the number of total messages I received, and the relative amount of spam.

So, in the last year, I received 13848 messages, out of which approximately 10445 were not spam. Of course, this means that about 3400 messages, or one in every four I received, was true, unsolicited commercial e-mail (aka, spam). Not as bad as many people, but still, it's a lot.

We'll see what 2004 holds. If it's anything like the last few weeks, though, the prognosis is not good.

Searching for New Year's Resolutions

The old year ended with some strange ways of googling the site:

• Hornet's nest Saturday Night Live
  
• Songs of Travel
  
• love grad school [I don't get this one, myself]
  
• Kitty Dukakis rubbing alcohol
  
• Peter Hopwood [he who allegedly scammed the Nigerian scammers]
  
• bargain countertenor
  
• and, in possibly the most frightening convergence of two bad ideas, my earlier post on Patch Adams and the WWE Christmas special has led to the search "closing credits WWE Christmas in Baghdad."

Horror of horrors.